Now, now, not all exes are cringe worthy. Everyone has that ex that becomes the buddy who willingly sets us up to new dates. But there are just relationships that are better forgotten – the ex in which could bring up painful or embarrassing memories. They are exes that we would gladly pay up for tickets to Mars or Neptune just so we could avoid running into them in public – FOR ETERNITY. Just for laughs, read this article on the 9 worst ex girlfriends.

But while that is remotely possible at the moment of writing, we all would have to deal with them in the classiest, coolest, most composed manner possible. If only to hide the ba-da-bing-ba-da-boom of your heartbeat, here’s helpful classy man’s guide to meeting an ex in public (and this applies to women too):

• Cloak that surprised look in your eyes into a delightfully surprised look. Never mind the thundering of your heartbeat. Never mind the butterflies in your stomach. Never mind the thoughts running in your head. She might have seen your surprise but she does not see how you feel inside. Turn your eyes-wide-in-shock look into the eyes-wide-in-surprise-and-smiling-in-delight one.

• Smile. A smile can instantly change your mood. Smile like you’re happy to see an old friend, but don’t smile too much and look creepy. Don’t smile too sweetly either as if to tell her you are romantically happy to have seen her again. Smile like you smile for some old acquaintance.

• Sound confident. Remember how confident you were when you first asked her out? Remember how confident you were on your first date? Channel your inner James Bond in confidence, act as if you’re wearing a tux on the runway, and watch how easily it is to talk with her.

• Think about it this way: she’s just as nervous as you. She may be good at hiding it but trust me, we girls are more tensed in these situations. Sure batting our lashes always makes it look easy breezy but chances are, our innards are shaking violently. Thinking that she’s feeling the same or maybe even worse than you should let some of the pressure off your back. This is also one of the keys to attraction according to Sonic Seduction.net.

• Don’t linger in the conversation. ‘Hi. Hello. How are you. Great  see you. Sounds awesome! ‘K. I gotta go, great seeing you again’ is more than enough. You are not required to face her and her new boyfriend for hours. You are not in any way obliged to know about her life, or tell her the current story of your life. Maintain eye contact, but don’t linger.

• Don’t look back and cry about it later. Yes, it is so tempting to look back at her after walking away just as tempting as it is to look back and wallow in the memories of the past relationship. Especially if she’s dating a new guy and you haven’t moved on yet. But that is not healthy and is practically useless. Walk straight away like nothing happened, and cry about it later.

This may be harder to pull off than impressing a girl on a first date, but get over it once and the second, third, fourth time will become easier every single time.

Here’s a list of hobbies that you, dear men, might want to try to learn if you want to be irresistible to us women:

• Music – you are very much aware that you’re so much more handsome than Steven Tyler or Gene Simmons but you don’t understand how they get to snag all the women. Even your garage band neighbors who seem to have lost the DNA for facial hair get more women than you. And you question yourself and hurt your ego at the thought: why? What you’ve been missing, obviously, is music. Music is the language of the world, is the language of love, and it reaches out where words have no power. Add to that the sweat, the passion that comes with playing music, the expressions that you can never fake, that…that’s what makes them attractive. Whether they sing, or play the piano, the electric guitar, the drums, the saxophone (ooh…saxophone), it has the same kind of effect.

• Speaking different languages – did you know that the ability to speak different languages is a sign of intelligence? And a surefire way to attract women? If you have searched far and wide on how to get a girlfriend, then you haven’t gone beyond one language. You may actually want to skip Google translate and learn two other languages. Impress your date by saying “you’re beautiful” in three languages and she’ll find herself mesmerized.

• Extreme sports – ahh, living the dangerous life. Tell her you’ve skydived after swimming with the sharks in Australia and that you’re going on a rock climbing trip to Peru next year and you’ll have her attention immediately. The adrenaline that rushes to your bloodstreams even as you speak of your dangerous hobbies will send signals from your male hormones to our female ones. And it would be even more impressive if we get to see you in action.

• Volunteerism – a lot of men think that what makes volunteer firemen sexy are their well-toned, well-trained muscles at the firehouse gym. They think these men are so sexy the moment they take off their fireproof suits. Au contraire, monsieur. Au contraire. They are sexier the moment they don their protective suits, all brave and ready to save lives. This is also true for EMT’s, military reservists, and guess what – volunteer big brothers at charity organizations. A man who puts himself out there to help others is very attractive. It touches that maternal, selfless side of every woman. Just look at how sexy Brad Pitt is for crashing a charity event.

• Leadership – Power is the most powerful aphrodisiac. Now you know why your local politicians were so, uhm, charismatic. Any hobby that give you the appointment of being a leader will automatically give you a sign on the forehead that says you’re attractive. Leading the local boy scouts, head a camping club, be a volunteer sports coach, or be the head of your local soup kitchen. You’ll instantly command attraction.

Knowing this, you may now either want to sign up to start these hobbies, or not forget to mention to your dates that you actually are into these things. Good luck.

Apparently, you have not yet moved on or you would not go as far as the second sentence. Of course you panic, you don’t know what to do, you’ve been so hoping that you could still get back together and you are caught getting hurt and getting mad at the fact that she didn’t even respect the three-month rule (does anyone ever really follow the three month rule, though?). You’ve got everything planned to try to court her again. Of course it is easy to simply let your inner animal loose and call her, maniacally demanding explanation, sending her drunk texts or whatever out-of-this-world reactions you could come up with.

Of course it is easy, but the easy way is more often than not, never the right way to go. So let’s ask the question again.

What do you do when you find out that your ex girlfriend is dating a new guy? How do you beat the new guy into making her fall, and get her back to you in the process?

Here are simple ways:

• Keep calm. Control your animalistic instinct to go all barbaric on her. Stop yourself from posting tirades towards her, directly or indirectly, on Facebook. Don’t call or text her asking for any explanation because more likely than not, she cannot give you any answer. Think things through and don’t do anything for about a week or two – remember, your anger is just the shock from what you’ve recently learned. Remember this socially proven stat: 90% of rebound relationships don’t work. Calm yourself before you plan or try to do anything.

• When you’ve calmed down, you will have a better, brighter perspective on things – one that is not clouded by anger or utter jealousy. You’ll be able to plan things better. Start by making yourself better. Get a job if you were jobless, try to lose weight, clean up your act, quit smoking, clean your house, start a good lifestyle, basically just make yourself better. Go to SIBG.com to regain your confidence. This takes time but whether you get your girl back or not, trust me you won’t regret getting this transformation.

• Talk to her, calmly and maturely. Make a bargain with her. Show her that you are a better person and that you have every intention of making your relationship work this time – that you both would address the issues together and try to fix them. Bargain with her, if possible, to give you guys a ‘trial period’ to restart the relationship. Use this time to fix your issues and see where it goes. If it works, well and good. If it does not, then you might have to move on for the better.

Like most everything else, thinking things through will help you pull off this situation. The most crucial thing to do for you is to never take revenge. Just because she is dating does not mean you should rush to the nearest club and hook up with the first girl you see just so you could show her that you’re dating too. That’s going to make things even more complicated and awkward.

And this can be a good thing or a bad thing if you’re trying to score dates. If you’re already in a relationship and looking into improving it, you might want to see my previous post. It’s a good thing because it makes knowing people easier – trust me, I know friends who have met their partners on Facebook, and it’s also a bad thing because a simple rude status or grammatically erroneous post can be detrimental to your whole image. I remember this one time, my friend was talking about this supposed cute guy that she met somewhere.

They exchanged their Facebook names and we were bound to do a background investigation on that particular person. True enough he was a looker. He had Abercrombie and Fitch biceps, David Beckham abs, and a smile that could live up to Hollywood standards.

But he had a Facebook profile that was going to make your mother cringe. His status posts were ‘senseless’, he was bullying some friend online and based on the comments we’ve seen, not everyone liked it, and he had  some really disappointing un-classy photos. And his existence has remained unforgotten and he was made the perpetual go to example of why men (and women alike) should be careful about how you present yourself on Facebook.

If you’re looking to seduce women, please don’t  do it on Facebook. If you need more info on how to do it, click here.

And so gents, listen up. Here are some tips on how to keep your Facebook profile attractive:

1. Do not be tagged in ugly or socially detrimental photos. Go to settings, click ‘Account Settings’, and look for the ‘Timeline and Tagging’ option on the left side. Turn ‘On’ the option that says ‘Review tags people add to…’ This will allow your friends to still tag you in photos but you have the option to be tagged in them and allow them to show on your own profile. And, help yourself, do not post a photo that makes you look anywhere between a jerk and a douchebag.

2. Keep your status posts sensible and classy. An intelligent man is always sexy. Sure you can fool around in your status posts with friends but find that fine line between classy and trashy. Also, it would be very wonderful if you keep your grammar and spelling in check all the time. And, yes, bullying is disgusting!

3. Review your ‘shares’ and ‘likes’. What you share or like on your Facebook timeline says a lot about you. Especially that a lot of people post hoax online, it is very easy to fall into believing these lies and end up looking like an idiot. If a post says ‘RIP Barack Obama’, check your CNN.com to verify the information. It’s a huge turn off for a guy to be gullible. Oops, just saying.

4. Don’t talk too much on Facebook. A guy that has no life other than Facebook is boring. Seriously. Don’t you go to school or go to work? Don’t you have better things to do in life than just sit on Facebook all day?

Remember, people now go to Facebook when they want to know more about you. At least give the ladies something interesting to look at on Facebook.

Think before you click!

Everyone is talking about the first date: how to secure one, how to make it awesome and memorable, how to make a good enough impression to score a second date. While we’re so good at flirting with women to get her to say yes to the first date, we often don’t have a long-term plan. Heck, we don’t even have a second-date plan! We often plan way ahead for our first dates. But what about the second date? What should happen and how should you keep your good grades up in the second date – if you managed to get one?

The thing is, the follow up dates are just as crucial as the first date. You’ve caught the ladies’ attention on the first date so you got the second date – this is when you reaffirm the excellent first impression you made on them during the first date; the third one should seal it, and on the fourth if you’re lucky, at this point they think you’re really awesome, they love your company.

So while the first date was a little too much on the generic side – the weather, the news, Hollywood, social issues, people you know together, and whatever topic that sprung up during the date, the second one should be a little more personal but not too intimate. This is not the time to talk about sex or hint it, that’s just…no. NO.

Where to go

Do not do exactly what you did the last time. Try something memorable – and don’t forget to offer to pick her up. She should trust you by now, but don’t get upset if she wants to meet up instead.

A good idea on a second date is either doing something that she loves, or try out something you both have never tried before. Say, if she likes basketball or baseball, why don’t you take her to a game and then to dinner afterwards? Or you could go to the local fair and try out some games and rides. Win her a little something at the games too; she will remember you every time she sees that plush little panda you won. You could even go rock climbing!

Or take her on a Farmer’s Market Saturday and you dare each other to try all the food samplers. (Don’t forget to bring her to lunch afterwards or she’ll think you’re a cheapskate who got her free food on a date!)

What to talk about

The conversations on your second date should be a little more personal but not too intimate. This is when you get to know each other. Ask her about her childhood, where she went to school, what she likes and doesn’t like – basically send her the impression that you really are interested in her and you want to get to know her more.

Tip: Do not sound pushy, like you’re doing an interrogation for the FBI (talk about creepy!). Keep the flow of the conversation natural and if she seems uncomfortable over a topic, don’t push it.

Listen. And when it’s her turn to ask, answer her honestly, confidently and politely.

How to act on your second date

This is the phase of dating where you find your connection. And that is exactly what you should display: connection. Look into her eyes while talking, notice her – her dress, her watch, her smile, and talk about something you remember from the last time you went out. Women love men who take notice of the smallest things – in an uncritical manner of course – and those who listen.

And as usual, KEEP YOUR SMARTPHONES SHUT!  In this digital age, everybody is expected to have a smartphone. But we are also expected to know how to use it. By now, you should

know that cellphones can hurt relationships, and using your cellphone too often during a date isn’t a wise option.

Always remember that this is about testing your compatibility. How well you could communicate with each other is the prime gauge of compatibility at this point. So what are you still waiting for? Plan that second date now!

While you’re at it, there’s a good article on this site that would pave your way into making her fall in love with you, in case that’s what you want to happen eventually.

Speaking of property, I’ve been trying to convince my friends to visit me here for a holiday. The real estate industry here in Kuala Lumpur is at its peak—and I really think that now is a great time to buy property and invest. I came across this great article from the New York Times that makes it clear how Malaysia is becoming a major player in Asia, and how buying a house or a condominium unit now in this progressing country can be a good idea. I’ve written an article here before that explained how investing on property can make you look good in the eyes of women, so why not act on it and pay me a visit here sometime soon?

I’m having so much fun here, but don’t worry, I’ll keep in touch. Til next time!

As you may know, I am a part-time realtor specializing in brokering deals in the property vertical. Started off in Springfield, MA, and I joined an international realtor company which has a healthy portfolio of investments in Malaysia. I have been asked to move to Kuala Lumpur to build up our agency here for at least two years. It will be fun!

Being a newbie here in the Malaysia real estate industry, I have been networking with a lot of people, particularly agents from Reapfield and also developers like Mah Sing and Lions Group. In my free time, I also go to sites likes klcccondominiums.com.my (a site on luxury condominiums and apartments in the KLCC enclave) and also local property portals such as Home Guru, i-Properties and MetroSherpa.com. I’ve been really busy…

My blog updates will therefore be rather scarce from now on, but if you’re in town (here in Malaysia) and you want to talk about business (particularly real estate investment) then give me a call at 016-27277998 and I will buy you coffee. How about that?

Otherwise, come back often and better still, join my Facebook group!

I have dated lots of “sporty women” in my lifetime, and in this first installment of the Megalectores Method I will share with you an easy way to score with a sporty chick.

Perhaps a lot of men dream of dating a sporty chick – someone who rocks their world through sports. As much as it is quite rare to encounter a girl who loves sports, it is also rare to date this kind of girl. This is because these girls are so in love with sports and it can be rare for them to be deeply involved with guys. This is also why some people label them as homosexual or bisexuals. However, some guys still find them hot and challenging to be with. If you are one of the guys who love to date a sporty chick, then continue reading and discover how to get a sporty girl closer to you.

Sports is a rare aspect of a woman’s life. It has always been true since the past decade that women are never good at sports and they would rather be better off doing household chores. Men on the other hand are encouraged to play sports to show off their masculinity. However, many things change as the world lives by. It’s not surprising to see women’s league playing basketball, soccer, or softball. And this is the difficult part for men who loves these sporty chicks—they are just so into sports and not into dating men.

It can be very begrudging to see other men dating these so-into-sports women. But how do they do it? The answer is simple and quite flexible too. You just have to play their game. Pitch a softball or be a good catcher if you have to, or play as a goal keeper and challenge her striking skills. Some are rather enthusiastic in playing with men especially when they’re challenged. This is going to be a very good way to catch her attention which is the first step to getting close to this sporty goddess of your liking.

Another way to deal with her sports-focused attention is to act like you don’t know the game. That will be a great opportunity to ask her about her game and maybe even ask her to teach you how to play. This becomes even easier to act if you don’t know how to play at all. Try to estimate her personality and observe if she likes to teach newbies or if she would rather have you to challenge her. Most would surely want the latter. You just have to walk through the safer path towards approaching her or else it’s a failure.

Once you have passed the first trial, moving on to the next step will be easier. That is, if your strategy in the first step worked, your next move is to get her out of the court and get her to a date. Take note that you have already established similar interests. This alone will make her get interested in you. Dating will never be a problem by then. In other words, ask her out into a not-so-sporty get together but keep both parties burning with interest in sports. Soon you’ll get one hell of a sporty chick beside you for your friends and family to see as your girlfriend.

Watch out for the next installment of the Megalectores Method – coming up next Wednesday.

Not a lot of people use the term “court” when trying to win a woman over anymore. However, while courting used to mean picking up daisies before picking up a woman before a date, it is a much simpler, sweeter and more laid-back term nowadays. Here are several tips on how to seduce a woman in today’s day and age…

• Tip Number One: Become her friend.

Nowadays, the strongest relationships start with friendships and casual flirting. This way, you can learn more about her and spend more quality time with her instead of rushing into things. If you rush a relationship, you could lose the important bond that you might be searching for and you won’t be able to earn her respect and trust, either. What you should do is get to know her first and let her see every aspect of you. During this time, it would be important to be sweet, but not overbearing, though. So, although it would be alright to call her up at night, don’t wait until it is very late at night to do so.

• Tip Number Two: Do not suffocate her.

Although you want a woman to know that you like her, you shouldn’t suffocate her to death. So, even if you are in the same place at the same time, you shouldn’t just focus all of your attention on her. Socialize with other people, as well. This might sound crazy since women generally love being showered with attention, but you could scare them away if you shower them with too much attention. The following link is a good resource on how to do this well – read this.

• Tip Number Three: Ask her out properly.

Once enough time has passed, you can try to ask her out on a date. Before doing this, think about all of the time that you spent together so far. Think about your phone conversations and try to look for important and helpful clues. Does she like Japanese food, perhaps? Does she prefer casual joints or fine dining? Is she a fan of flowers? What’s her favorite kind? Try to remember all of the things that she loves and then make an effort to make your first date as memorable as possible.

• Tip Number Four: Treat her like royalty.

If she agrees to go out with you, then be a gentleman. Pick her up, bring her flowers, open the car door, help her get out of her coat, and pull her chair out for her. The majority of women in today’s day and age are no longer used to men doing these things for them. Since you are courting her, though, it would be best to keep a good and long-lasting impression, so why not make an effort when it comes to this? This is especially so if she’s your female boss!

• Tip Number Five: Impress her with your assets.

A good way to demonstrate high value is to show off your assets – financially. Let’s face it – rich guys are attractive. If you have a portfolio of real estate investments, for example, you will come across as high value. Successful people own properties! A good resource on how to get started would be here, here and here.

As you can see, courting a woman that you like really isn’t that difficult. Although it is definitely different compared to regular dating customs, you are sure to enjoy doing it and she is sure to love it even more. You might have to wait a little longer to get any special moments out of it, but in the end, it will just make those moments all the more special.

Got questions? Email me at jessica@megalectoresdeciencia.com and I’ll reply you with more insights!

If you want to buy a unit off-plan and avoid paying for transfer duty, you should learn how to buy property from a developer. By doing this, your developer of choice will pay VAT since your unit hasn’t been constructed yet. Then, once your unit has been completed, you can occupy the property as needed. When you do this, you can then immediately show the unit off to the woman you want to impress.

While learning how to buy property from a developer, you will have to pay a deposit to keep your unit safe. Naturally, you will need to know what is part of the off-plan and what isn’t, as well. You will also have to make sure that you do not make your final payment until you have occupied the property; otherwise, you could be held liable for repayment and interest later on.

Here are other things you will need to take into consideration if you want to buy property from a developer directly:

1. View the plans.

Make sure that you look at the development plans, ask how long it would take to finish and how many planned future phases there are in the complex. You might have to make some interior decorating changes as time goes by, as well. Ensure that you get your girlfriend’s opinions about the interior decoration – women like to give ideas on things like this.

2. Find a reputable developer.

Make sure you find a reputable and well-known developer with a proven track record. If needed, investigate the credentials of your developer of choice before committing to buying a unit from him.

3. Find a reputable builder.

Find out whether your developer of choice has a reputable builder lined up, too.

Overall, there are a lot of reasons why you should learn how to buy property from a developer directly. For starters, you will get to save a lot of money since there aren’t any real estate agents or commissions involved. Some real estate agents make more than 10% commissions on off-plan properties, so you can definitely save a lot of money by buying your property directly from a developer. If you are an investor, then you can get even bigger discounts if you buy multiple properties in one development.

There are a couple of places which immediately conveys value and prestige in the eyes of women – and you should be aiming to buy some of these properties. For example, owning a KLCC condo is a social status in Malaysia. Think about it.

Aside from money, you will also be able to save a lot of time since you will be able to get all of the answers that you need without having to go through numerous websites or look through various property advertisements by different real estate agents. Plus, real estate agents usually have to verify their information with their developers anyway, so why not just go directly to a developer instead? This way, you can ask your developer about the sunlight that you can expect in the morning, the security locks on the doors and anything else regarding the property that you want to know. After all, the developers build them and own them, so they will always have the answers to your needs.

Lastly, if you learn how to buy property from a developer, you will never get confused in terms of property availability. The majority of property developers out there have a lot of real estate agents selling properties for them. Despite this fact, though, these real estate agents still double book places sometimes. So, by going to a developer directly, you can be sure that you will find out which properties are actually available and which ones aren’t.

In my next blog article, I will share tips on how to appear attractive to women by working to progress in your career. Watch this space.